Arrivals!

After spending an hour at the arrivals gate last night waiting for my sister to return from Greece, I left with a warm fuzzy feeling. It's incredible the amout of joy and emotion that pours out of that waiting area. It's kind of like a game show for the masses. The big opaque door opens and the mass of people waiting and hoping, hold their breaths to see if they are the lucky receipients of the passenger comming through the other side. But the best thing about the whole deal is that eventually everyone gets their turn. Joy, laughter and tears all constantly re-surfacing. It was so refreshing. I mean if you're ever down in the dumps someday and you're just jonesing for some happiness, just hang out at the arrivals gate at your local airport! I'm hoping to catch the wake of some of that joy, as I will be spending a fair bit of time in the next few days in airports. I'm really kind of anxious to see my game show participent when I arrive in Ottawa this evening. Should be fun!

It's raining today so it looks like KJ's BBQ plans might be foiled. Too bad really, but perhaps we'll just get all the girls together and we can go out for brunch... who knows. I am however thankful for the rain today.

Niagara to Brampton

So the past few days have been busy, busy, busy! I arrived in Brampton on Wednesday night and then left Thursday afternoon for Audey and Griffs wedding. Before I left there was the phone interview with the lady from San Fran for the position in the U.K don't know how well it went really. it's a new position so they're not quite sure exactly what they're looking for. Who knows it may just work out...

Driving for 2 hours when I haven't driven in moths was so strange. It's such a novelty... The only painful issue was the lack of good tunes on the radio and the total lack of a CD player. But I can't complain really. The rain didn't hold off for the wedding. It was lovely nonetheless. I'll have to post some pictures when I get back to Ottawa and pull them off the memory card. I think that the rain really added a lot of character to the ceremony. It was so lush and beautiful in the garden, the rain made it feel really intimate. I'm sure not everyone felt that way, but I thought it was great. Funny how when you get older you get so teary eyed at weddings. It's such a joyous time but there wasn't a dry eye to be seen. I guess emotions get soft and mushy with age... We had a great dinner, drank LOTS of wine and got very little sleep. Driving back was a slight bit more painful seeing as I'm thinking that the lack of sleep issue hampered my abilities to stay alert. It was all good.

Went out last night with la Noeleen. It's great to see her as always... Living so far away from each other certainly doesn't help matters much. Went to this interesting bar in Missisagua. Met a kindred spirt named Steve. Had a good chat and a few good laughs. It's really nice to just sit back and chat with someone with no pretences. I guess living the lifestyle that I do makes me quite open minded... It's not often you meet people who can appreciate the same sort of free spirit. There are so many budding writers popping up all around me. It's so inspiring. Talking the Steve about micro fiction has sparked off my desire to give it a go. It's such a great outlet this writing thing!

Not going to manage to see any of my relatives on this visit. They're all up at the cottage. Slightly disapointing since I'm leaving next Wed. I probably won't even get to see them! Oh well. I've never been stellar at doing family visits.

Had lunch with mum today... she's too cute. She's been very tolerant of the whole facial piercing issue. Mind you she's clearing avoiding looking at me while she speaks to me... but I give her a lot of brownie points for the effort. I know if this was 2 years ago she would have been raising a stink... maybe she's just mellowing out with age. It's fun to spend time with her.

I've committed to doing some serious packing this evening... get everything sorted out. I'm looking forward to heading back to Ottawa and wrapping everything up. I'm also looking forward to Sunday evening....

Going for brunch and probably going to pick up KJ at the airport this evening when she gets in from Greece. Busy, busy, busy!

Drop Dead Fred
Woke up early today... first good sleep in a long time. Cool breeze comming through my window helped matters a great deal. Read my book... drank some coffee and relaxed.

Watched one of my favorite 80's movies with Annik... Drop Dead Fred. I'm not certain who the actor is who plays Fred but it is quite the eccentric treat. I'm thinking that Drop Dead Fred would make a brilliant hallowe'en costume... Especially when he is at the cocktail party wearing the dashing green long tail tuxedo. he has his orange hair all up on end and adjoining at a point at the top of his head. I think I would have no proble doing that style... in fact I can honestly admit awaking some mornings having acheived that hair do in my sleep. It's good to laugh. I couldn't think of a better Saturday morning movie. *giggles to self*

Responses

I thought I would just paste in some of the Sarah-descriptions that I recieved in response to my last posting. Thanks guys, it was a lot of fun!

Sawa: courage, happiness, intel-man fetishism, lust for life, cool t-shirts, sultans and jumpers, and unequalled in plays well with others!

Sarah: (please note this one was written in orange!) optimism, freedom, energizing, caring, funny, fun loving, fun toys, free spirited, welcoming, colorful, non-judgemental, fair, brave, open to anything, author of my favourite quote "I broke my girl parts"; smart, creative, wackyness! The world is a good place because of her - I will miss her.

Lists, Thank yous and goodbyes

So I'm thinking as a going away present for my friends I'm going to compile a sort of thank you list. Not like I'm dying or anything... more so that I want them to know that I appreciate the value they've brought to my life. A little token of the now. People drift apart and change directions in life... I want to make sure to appreciate the Now.

Here's a little list of impressions and shared moments/tidbits that I've jotted down about some of the people in my life... yea yea it's alphabetical, but it was just easier that way.


Amelia: Quality gossip sessions, waxing sessions, smoke socials, laughter, survivor, passion to succeed, pride and power!
Andrew snazzy, sporty, kind, tennis inspiration, chef extraordinaire, beer drinking survivor watching pal.
Benoit: Heartwarming laughter, memories of France, patience, inspiration and understanding
Brad: Brutal honesty, belly laughs, golf tips, honor (for having driven the Bradadllac) and a good case of the fever.
Charlotte: Laughter, broken girl parts, support, compassion and kindness, inspiration
Cheryl: Free spiritedness, artistic ness, laughter, fun, cruising, Tegan and Sara, camping adventures
Danielle: Patience, strength, fury, passion, pain, joy, laughter, adventure, butter ripple shooters, great shoes, time well spent
Darrell: Sweetness, laughter, kindness, understanding, generous, pride, craziness in Montreal (nudge nudge wink wink)
Dom: Undying passion for fashion, laughter, inappropriate flirting, chill vibes, positivity
Jeff: Sweetness, musical passion, radiohead, joy, understanding, pride, artistic assistance
Johnny: relentless humor, compassion, support, inspiration, kindred eccentricities, joy!
Josh: Amazing spirit and generosity, Sally Ann and thrift shop styles that continually blow my mind, handy, daring, caring and kind
Isabelle: Delicate kindness, Uncontrollable giggling in Benoit's bed (avec son petit sac d'eau qu'on buvait comme des folles)
Karm: Longevity, hilarity, zaniness, support, pride, unconditional friendship (through all our ups and downs), "Cigarette? Prepare to pleasure me."
Lynn and Karen: Pure goodness and kindness of spirit, acceptance, fun and laughter, all in the short span of a couple of months.
Maureen: Girl power, money sense, encouragement, self value, inspiration and focus and laughter
Mark: Gentleness, wisdom and patience beyond his years, quirky honesty, my partner in adoration of "when night is falling", staggering creativity, date squares
Sean: Love, Compassion, strength, support, inspiration, confidence, and enough campy expressions to cushion my lexicon from now till eternity
Siobhan: Laughter, comfort, understanding, fun and all in the span of a few short weeks before she left
Suki: Inspiration to write, tingles, reflective ness, kindness and acceptance. (and I've only met her twice)
Suzy: Artistic inspiration, ground breaking fashion, free spiritness, kindness, the best popcorn in the world, survivor, smoke chats
Yvonne: Inspiration strength, pride, sensibility, drive, focus, brutal honesty, amazing compassion and support and who can forget Glitter!

Shopping.

So I went to the shops today. Strange things is, while I was thinking about what to write down today, I can't seem to remember being there. I know I walked from my house to downtown with squinty eyes (no sunglasses). I mean I know I was there, I know where I went... but when I try and have memories of what I did it seems more abstract than real...

Must be the heat.

Hot hot hot!

In case you didn't guess it... it's been HOT!

I spent nearly the entire day packing and packing and purging all but the bare necessities of life. I can't belive how much nostalgia comes with it! It's all good.

KJ was supposed to come and visit me on her way back from rafting this morning... took a wrong turn and ended up in the wrong direction. Instead of turning around she just continued on home. Too bad, I would have loved to have seen her, but it makes a lot more sense for her to get home and rest before she flies to England tonight. She's a mad work 'o holic!

This long weekend has been so novel. I've spent a lot of time by myself... organizing and planning. Trying to keep it as low key as humanly possible so as to avoid a nasty anti-climax once I arrive.

Found Eric's story that he wrote called trinity. It's such a pleasure to read. He really is a talented writer. Read it out loud to Danielle. A strange sort of episode of closure with two of my ex's all at once. Sweet.

Early rising and fiery aftermath

Out last night at the lookout with Siobhan, had a few drinks and soaked up the non smoking environment. What a joy it was to come home and not reek of smoke.

Reeking of smoke was all about yesterday afternoon. Helping Sean and Michael clear out their apt. after the fire that happened on Thursday morning. Tragic really, but no one was hurt so it's all good. I wasn't in the house but 2 minutes before every inch of my body was saturated by the smoky campfire smell. This was no campfire... No insurance meant a lot of sifting though rubble for any surviving artifacts or clothes. Sean sees it as a purging. Forced as it may be it's a sure-fire way to part with objects which under normal circumstances would cause endless hours of humming and hawing whether to keep or not. It's gone, and there aint a darned thing that you can do about it to make it all come back. Happily enough, Sean did speak of a great feeling of freedom. It's very true that the objects and material possessions to which we treasure the most can be at times, an unforeseen weight.

New beginnings, all around me... Some forced, some unfair, some chosen. Its strange how you coast along life at times and everything seems so stable and uneventful... and I'm not sure if it's not until you seek out change yourself, that you see it occurring all around you. Or if some sort of planetary alignment can spark of these sorts of events. I'm
kind of thinking that it's a bit of both. I think it's safe to allow myself that thought...

men•tal / 'men-t&l
1 a : of or relating to the mind; specifically : of or relating to the total emotional and intellectual response of an individual to external reality

' ir•ri•ga•tion /"ir-&-'gA-sh&n/ noun
1 : WET, MOISTEN: as a : to supply (as land) with water by artificial means b : to flush (a body part) with a stream of liquid (as in removing a foreign body or medicating)
2 : to refresh as if by watering

The park people

I'm finding myself to be much more observant than normal as of late. I think it has a lot to do with the fact that I'm leaving soon, so I'm trying to soak in all of the scents, scenery and people in this beautiful city of Ottawa. This morning on my leisurely walk to work, I couldn't help but notice all the park people. Scattered indiscriminately around confederation park were people. People of all different colours and social classes all just resting. One girl was soundly sleeping on her back on the edge of the fountain. Quite fascinating. I had the overwhelming feeling that they were all there just waiting for time to pass. Like waiting for your plane to board or your bus to come, they were time waiters. I can sympathize with that; of late I've found myself slipping into time waiting mode. I mustn't remain idle too long. I have too much absorb.

Half day of work today, and plenty of sunshine. No blockages today!

Lust, lust, lust

The distance between time and space and sweaty naked skin is so blurry. The daze of a hangover coupled with time well spent... life is sweet.

I'm feeling so distracted today and I'm thinking that I know why. Sometimes Wednesday nights should really be Friday nights... if only I could re-arrange time.

"Do you think if you press yourself so tightly against someone's chest that eventually your hearts will begin to beat at the same rhythm?" "I doubt it" I replied. But for now, I want to believe. Ahh, the simple pleasure of fully enjoying the time and space that you're occupying.

Sweet sweet lust. I like it here, can I stay for a while?

Mental irrigation.

So I thought that this might be a good way to do this. Write some thoughts, keep track of time, give proper acknowledgement to the things and people that interact with on a daily basis. Make sure that things flow smoothly... unclog the blocks.

I am but a few short days away from leaving my job, apartment and country to embark upon a new chapter of my life... So really, I guess it's like starting at the begining.

T-minus 31 days and I'll be boarding a plane to England. Much to do before then. Lots of string to tie up. lucky for me I know a few sailing knots.